just another quarter life crisis

ive spent my morning at the ualr website, swallowing my pride and researching a MALS degree.
a MA in Liberal Studies is the perfect degree for me.
see i dont know what i want to be when i grow up.
people have asked me this questions my entire life. and except for a brief period in kindergarten when i wanted to be a tollbooth operator, ive had good answers.
when i was in junior high i was going to duke- cause daddy went there- and i was going to be a lawyer. when i was in high school i was going to furman to study music and become the first broadway lead over 6 feet tall.
God has a great sense of humor.
i was called to ouachita, in the middle of nowhere, and started various degrees... english, polisci...
and finally settled on history and education. so i teach. that what you do with those degrees.
but every couple of months i play the "what if?" game.
what if i did something else?
i enjoy teaching. but im not sure if its what ive been called to do. and that one little word can trip up the best of intentions.
ive always been jealous of people who say "i knew at 15 i was called to china to preach at the orphanage." when i was 15 my main goal was to avoid being grounded, again. i covet those specific callings to teach, to preach, even the ones to fix leaky sinks. people who know what they are suppose to do and do it are fascinating to me.
my dad's like that. he is suppose to be a doc and he's good at it and he enjoys it and on those good days everything just seems like it fits together.
im not there yet. and something tells me i might never be there. im too flaky to ever settle somewhere for long- a rambler i suppose.
so im researching a buffet style degree in a city i never thought i would be in
and praying for lightnin'.